CONSPIRACIES OF TYRANNY

You know, I use to think people who thought there was a conspiracy against them were just melodramatic, paranoid, and a little self-absorbed.

That is, until there became a conspiracy against me.

I'm not really sure why people chose to follow others into hatred. As far as I know, there are 6 or 7 people who "hate" me, half of which I don't even know, I mean, really. As far as I know, I haven't done anything directed negatively towards these people- I haven't gone out of my way to be annoying or clingy or ignore them completely (hehe, I rhymed). I tell you I could not be more honest when I say these people don't even know me. Maybe they don't understand me (even though they mostly know nothing about me, honestly), and maybe that scares them, so you can only feel comfort in hatred.

I see it all as fake. I mean, I know it all had to have started with Lauren, but...what's the point? What is the point of wasting your energy and thoughts on hating someone that you don't even know? What's the point in feeling such feelings that are so insincere. Moreover, one of these people pretends to be alright with me, indeed even interjects conversation. In this, I feel that a few are being insincere about hating me, they just say that to....fit in...or comfort...I have no clue, I just find it totally obscure, pasturized, and rather immature. What can I expect though, it is high school.

I've thought about giving them all a reason to hate me- being an asshole, deliberately acting stupid or rude, but I haven't acted on these thoughts. I also do not feel that is at all necessary, because then I'd be the hypocrite wasting my energy on them. Rather, I'd like to ask a few why it is they hate me- what have I done, or what antics just generally unnerve them.

Now, this does not mean I will do so for everyone. No, though I would like to better understand where the hatred derived from in Lauren, I would rather she approach me, considering I could give a shit to ever talk to her worthless ebing again. I mean, she did the initial offence, so that's all the message I need. But there are a few that really are ignorant, egotistical, hypacritical bastards, which I do not like. I, unlike them however, let my feelings be known, in a civil way, mind you.

I'm not really sure about what to do about it all, truthfully, I just know something must be done. I don't see how I could be such an annoyance and not be obnoxious or envolved at all with any of these people. But something must be done, because it's wrong for people to act in such a manner, though it happens everyday, and I will not stand for it.

Time to kick some ass ***pops knuckles***